Illinoir

I approached her desk. She nodded me into a chair. I sat.

“…that’s why it’s flawed,” she said into the phone. Her anger was palpable. “I explained it already…. No, it’s not because it’s cheaper…. What don’t you understand?…. They’re replica Muslim prayer rugs…. So, devout Muslims leave an obvious flaw in each rug they make because only God can be perfect…. It’s true, I asked a Muslim guy at my gym…. Fine, I’ll get you his number…. Fine, bye.” She hung up the phone.

“That flaw thing is bullshit, and if it’s not it’s incredibly asinine.”

“I don’t care what you think, Arthur,” she said.

“Seriously, it’s all a marketing ploy by Muslim prayer rug weavers. Some tourist was pissed because the quality of the souvenir prayer rug he had bought wasn’t up to his incredibly high standards and complained about it. Rather than just swapping out the rug for one that didn’t have a flaw, the guy just fed the tourist that incredibly ridiculous line. Can you imagine if everything they did they did like that? It makes no sense.” I paused. Kelly was barely listening. I went on anyway. I didn’t really have anything better to do. “But check this out, the flaw in the whole story is the idea that unless the rug makers deliberately leave a flaw in the rug, that it would be perfect which is just not true, since not only is God the only one around who’s allowed to be perfect, He’s also the only one that can actually be perfect. Even if the rug maker doesn’t leave the flaw, his prayer rug wouldn’t be perfect. It’d just be a prayer rug of some certain amount of quality.”

I stopped, thought it about some more.

“Are you done?” Kelly asked after a moment or two.

“Not really,” I said, for I had considered another angle. “What the hell is a ‘perfect’ prayer rug anyway? Is there some Platonic ideal prayer rug out there? Is perfection a prayer rug that will perfectly cushion a  supplicant’s knees as he prays? Or one that will somehow expedite the delivery of the prayers from prayer to prayee? Or is it just some perfection of the pattern in the rug, some ideal design that would make the rug superior to all others?”

“Please, stop,” Kelly said.

“Ok, but one more thing: what if the ideal, perfect prayer rug is one that ostensibly appears to be perfect except for one particularly obvious and purposely made flaw? What if by making that flaw, the rug maker is accidentally making the most perfect prayer rug that was ever made?”

“You don’t ever stop, do you? And you don’t ever actually have a point.”

“My point is this: by interfering with the process of making something, by putting something into our creations in order to placate an imaginary friend who lives in the sky, we are limiting ourselves in ways that we shouldn’t be. We should all just strive to do the best work we can, knowing that no matter how hard we try, we will never attain perfection, whatever perfection might be, whatever that nebulous concept might be.”

“‘Strive to do the best work we can?’” Kelly asked. “That sounds like good advice for you, Arthur.”

“Oh, without a doubt. My efforts are often paralyzed by the fact that no matter how hard I try, I know I’ll never get it quite right.”

“So it’s not laziness then?”

“Oh, that’s a big part of it.”